One of the great mysteries of female ejaculation is why some women can do it – and some cant…
And even when they’re doing everything that experts say is necessary for a woman to squirt, they still cant do it.
But maybe this isn’t such a mystery after all!
You see, the G spot seems to be a point where sexual and emotional wounding is held in the body. If you haven’t heard of the idea of cellular memory before, look at it this way: every unexpressed emotional trauma has energy behind it – and if its not verbalized or given expression in some other way, it goes into the body.
Even the smallest emotional wound, I believe, is held in the body perhaps as a little bit of tension in muscle fibers, or a slight disturbance to the metabolism of the tissues.
And there seem to be some places where the consequences of these emotional wounds are held more than others: nerve complexes such as the solar plexus – and, as you may have guessed – the G spot seem to fall into this category.
The consequence of every sexual and emotional wound a woman has experienced but not expressed or dealt with seems to be held in her G spot or pelvic area.
And that can include every act of unwanted but permitted sexual intercourse as well as the more obvious traumas such as sexual assault or abuse.
And as the emotional wounds accumulate over time it appears that the reponsivity of the G spot to sexual stimulation numbs out.
Its kind of like a defense mechanism where somebody who’s been abused in childhood cuts themselves off from their feelings and holds it in the body instead.
Female Ejaculation, Squirting, And G Spot Healing
There’s more to female ejaculation than shooting a stream of gorgeous feminine fluid as far as possible or having mind blowing orgasms!
For G spot stimulation can help women discover the erotic potential of the female body, which has unlimited capacity to express motions such as love and intimacy as well as unlimited capacity for expressing sexual pleasure in orgasm after orgasm.
In other words, awakening the G spot and checking out its potential for female sexual pleasure is about validating the power of feminine energy and the female body.
On top of that, of course, its about validating each and every woman in her sexuality.
So this is no minor thing we are dealing with here, and it needs treating seriously.
The G Spot Video
The G Spot Is a Gateway to Healing Sexual Trauma
So if that’s true, that explains why some women begin to feel pleasure from G spot stimulation and then suddenly are stopped dead in their tracks (as Deborah Sundahl puts it) by painful memories and events from their past.
Even if a woman is motivated to enjoy sex with her current partner, and wants to be open and trusting, she may find that the historical memory (even if she doesn’t actually consciously remember or feel them) of her previous experiences and prevent her from experiencing G spot arousal, female ejaculation, and whole-body orgasm.
Video Sexual Healing & G Spot Trauma
The statistics for sexual abuse of women are distressingly high. And even those who haven’t suffered overt sexual assault get messages from society which are unhelpful to a woman’s sexual self image: in this context you can think of the sexualization of women’s bodies in advertising, messages about the classic double standard (a whore in the bedroom and a Madonna outside it), or the cultural message that good girls cant be sluts.
On and on it goes: negative messages about female sexuality which represent in some way the dominance of the patriarchy in our history, and perhaps even in our society today.
So if the emotional scars of all of this are stored in the G spot and the other tissues of the pelvic region (and there’s plenty of evidence that is indeed so) then before any woman can learn how to squirt, she may well need to experience sexual healing.
What this means in practice is the reawakening of the G spot, and the healing of emotional and sexual scars.
How Is This to Happen?
First of all, over time the G spot tends to heal naturally, simply because of the healing energy that flows through intimacy, love and close emotional connection.
But that isn’t enough: to get the emotional wounds, or the consequences of the wounds, out of the tissues of the body, its necessary to give the G spot a little conscious and intentional assistance.
And one way to do this is a G spot massage.
Please understand that in the context of what were discussing, even forcibly offering a G spot massage, or putting any pressure on a woman to accept it, before she is emotionally open and safe enough to do so without feeling uncomfortable or scared, can in itself be yet another emotional wound.
This is delicate work, and needs to be handled sensitively.
It needs to be done when a woman is ready for it to be done. Make no mistake about it – this is the passport to the merging of sex and love. (That’s a statement which those who have always kept them separate will understand better than those who haven’t.)
For to merge sex and love into one intimate embrace is one of the most powerful experiences that a human being can engage in with another human being. This is where hearts meet. This is work that needs the deepest respect.
But there’s always a but you need to be prepared for the release of the emotions associated with the trauma stored in the G spot when healing begins.
Its pretty obvious, I think, that the release of these emotions, whatever form it may take, is necessary for complete healing.
But its a bit like the power of the atom: you cant imagine that such energy could be stored in something so small.
And there’s no way of knowing what may emerge during G spot healing – it ranges all the way from hysterical laughter and joyous giggling through to intense range.
Deborah Sundahl speaks of experiencing the deepest sense of utter devastation she had ever felt in her life after a G spot massage which then actually took her to orgasm.
How do you cope with this? Well, being prepared for this can allow the energy to flow through you while you psychologically stand, metaphorically at least, to one side and observe it.
You wont die, and in one sense release of emotional trauma isn’t even painful: its simply an experience from which you can maintain your distance
with the conscious knowledge that its the consequence of events which occurred long ago in your history.
Giving a G Spot Massage
For the person who is the giver, the massager, the one who is giving a woman her G spot massage, the most important thing is not to take these emotions personally.
As soon as you do that, you’re into a dynamic about your current relationship, and that has the potential to be very destructive.
Yet when you feel your female partner raging, projecting her anger at some historical event onto you, her current, no doubt much loved, partner, it can be a challenge.
And overcoming the challenge of NOT taking this personally is very necessary. Protecting yourself from the emotional storm is also very necessary. Put in place any psychic shield techniques that you know of.
An effective one is to imagine yourself in a cocoon of golden light shimmering all around you like a protective bubble in which you are safe from your partners projections.
You can imagine all of the emotional energy she release hitting the bubble, and, no matter what it is, being transformed into positive energy and reflected back out into the universe.
So: you might now be wondering whether its actually worth experimenting with G spot healing!
But let me tell you something: if you want to go deeper, and you want to experience the most profound level of intimacy and connection, then yes, it really is worth going through the early stages of sexual healing.
And that’s true whether or not you want to make a woman squirt.
Sure, not all G spot healing sessions go this deep. Indeed, they don’t need to go that deep to have a profound impact.
And its actually possible to avoid stepping into the trauma if you choose to do so.
Avoiding the Trauma of G Spot Healing
To start with, most women need to be sexually aroused to some degree before they can accept a finger on their G spot. And that may take time: which is often the enemy of men’s patience, men being naturally programmed to do things quickly, particularly around sex.
But slow and gentle are the watchwords here: a sensitive and caring G spot massage is what is needed.
So when the woman is ready, and only when the woman is ready, the man or woman offering the G spot massage can insert his finger into her vagina and find her G spot.
If she is sufficiently aroused, it will feel smooth, perhaps like it has little grapes under the surface: if shes not aroused, itll feel ridgy and hard to the touch.
In which case, more sexual arousal is needed, perhaps by means of gentle clitoral stimulation, but more likely with intimate touch and close connection and loving touch on the whole of the woman’s body.
Female anatomy location of the G spot
So as a couple do this, its better that they are connected energetically and emotionally.
Eye gazing is a particularly good way to build and maintain connection, although a woman may find it difficult to maintain such connection when she begins to experience feelings coming up.
(And indeed, in this context, anyone’s ability to maintain eye contact for prolonged periods of time is a good guide to how comfortable they are with intimate connection).
Assuming that all of these prerequisites are met, the person giving the G spot massage can begin to move his or her finger over the recipients G spot, responding to her feedback as he or she goes.
There are different ways of moving the finger and they may produce different responses: a kind of windscreen wiper movement from side to side; a backwards and forward motion with the pad of a crooked finger; squeezing or rolling with one finger on each side of the G spot tissue; and simply pressing in a place which is sensitive until the sensitivity diminishes.
Up Come The Feelings!
As the G Spot massage continues, a woman is going to feel all kinds of things, from joy to rage. And more subtle things too, like an undercurrent of abandonment or loss… Its impossible to know what will happen.
But when the massager hits a sensitive spot, the recipient may only be able to take a limited amount of massage in each session.
That means healing becomes a cumulative process. At difficult moments, its certainly possible for a woman to breathe out through the trauma as the massager maintains the right degree of pressure on the sensitive spot, so that the pain and the emotional memories gradually fade.
Remember that the objective of this exercise is to allow energy to flow again: whenever energy hits a block, it stops. When the block gets released, energy moves again.
Interestingly enough, it seems that one of the reasons why women become bitchy, or nagging, or frustrated is because feminine energy is blocked.
Perhaps, if they were able to express the feeling behind those behaviors, the behaviors would fade away.
But a block on sexual energy is responsible for the distorted expression of feminine energy. In other words, when love cant flow, is it replaced by the shadow energy of anger or irritation or frustration – which appears in a behaviour of nagging, being bitchy, or some other unattractive quality.
Remember that the wounds that you’re dealing with in giving a G spot massage can be as delicate as a woman having sex when she doesn’t want to, or when a woman gives way to heavy persuasion to have sex, but shed rather say no.
While she is receiving the G spot massage, its important that the woman verbalizes her emotions, or makes noise to discharge the feelings and trauma.
Encouragement from the massager may be necessary here, because some women will be inhibited about expressing the noises that naturally go with their emotional wounds.
And gentle encouragement to breathe into a sound, or to allow a sound to be in her throat can be sufficient to encourage a woman to express herself, and thereby discharge the residue of emotional wounds.
If the man or woman giving the massage joins in with the sounds, this can encourage the receiver to voice her own feelings.
So theres a lot of work to be done here, but the rewards are usually worthwhile. Not only is female ejaculation fun, and making a woman squirt a load of fun for woman and partner alike, but G spot orgasm is a profoundly emotional experience which can lead a woman to greater connection and intimacy with her partner.