A really interesting question is why anybody would want to experience female ejaculation. After all, you might say, aren’t we all built to have sex in a certain way – men penetrate women, men ejaculate, then men bring women to orgasm ….. is the way sex often works.
And in any case, women aren’t built to ejaculate in the way that men are – it goes against the natural order of things… Or so some people might say.
The truth the matter is that if you move away from the idea that ejaculation is linked to male climax, you might find it possible to accept the idea that female ejaculation is also completely normal.
Understanding Female Ejaculation
Sure, female ejaculation is shrouded in mystery, to both men and women alike. A situation that’s not been helped by the fact that scientists can’t even agree if such a thing exists or not, and if it does, what form it takes.
For example, we know that there is tissue surrounding the urethra in women that resembles prostatic tissue in men, but nobody is sure whether or not the liquid produced by this tissue is a thick creamy material which dribbles out of some women’s urethras at the point of orgasm, or whether it’s a thin clear fluid which has very slight similarities to urine, which can be ejaculated with real force.
This is all very confusing. Somebody’s even suggested that young people may think that female ejaculation is just a stunt invented by the porn industry.
Video – Squirting.
Where does the truth lie?
One woman who’s been investigating female ejaculation for a very long time as Deborah Sundahl, who is basically sex educators worked in the field female ejaculation and understanding the G spot for many years.
And of course there are still plenty of people who claim the G spot doesn’t really exist, that it’s a constructed male sexual fantasy, and that not all women have one. Reality: it produces fluid which can be expelled forcibly during gushing or squirting, in what has become known as a a squirting orgasm.
Again, the truth is the G spot is recognized as a genuine “functioning female organ” (as Deborah Sundahl puts it), and in anatomical and medical circles it’s known as “the female prostate”.
Furthermore, for any woman who’s experienced G spot orgasm there’s no question about the reality of this – or that this tissue forms a vital part of female sexuality.
When you think about the way the G spot is often described – as an area of tissue that needs to be sensitized before it can feel sexual pleasure – it’s no surprise that women who don’t experience G spot orgasms might wish to deny its existence, because the very acceptance of the concept somehow puts them into a “second-class” group of women who can’t orgasm in this apparently really special way!
However, Deborah Sundahl’s approach is rather different – she just simply encourages all women to accept the reality of the G spot and tells them they are all capable of learning how to ejaculate.
So what’s necessary, then, for women to achieve ejaculation?
First of all, to learn where the prostate gland, the female prostate gland that is, is located in the body. The second step is to increase your own awareness of its sensitivity and discover how it may be stimulated by sexual desire and/or physically with a finger or penis (or of course, vibrator).
Gradually this will lead to an awareness of the ejaculatory fluid which can build inside the body, and of course, in the end, the final stage of learning to female ejaculate is the confidence to release this fluid. Perhaps delicately, perhaps forcibly in a squirting or gushing orgasm. Read more about female ejaculation here. And see it on videos.
It’s an interesting thing that medical science rejects female ejaculation as a construct of the imagination, because it’s been around for generations – Aristotle talked about it, Tantrikas talk about it, and Amrita or the nectar of the gods has been known for a very long time… And so it goes on…
Yet women can begin to doubt themselves very easily when it comes to sexual matters, especially when men are saying something that women know to be real doesn’t actually exist.
So to reiterate, the G spot or female prostate can be felt through the upper wall of the vagina as a woman lies on her back.
But because this area of tissue surrounds the urethra, which emerges above the vagina in the urethral meatus, there is often confusion that the fluid released during female ejaculation consist of urine. But the fluid released is anything but urine.
Deborah Sundahl talks of asking roomfulls of women talking about sexuality how many stop in the middle of lovemaking to go to the bathroom. She says about 30% consistently raise their hands and say they’ve done this.
Obviously these women think they’re having to pee during lovemaking. Then she asks how many women have to go to pee immediately after they’ve finished making love, another 30% raise their hands.
She says that these women don’t know they have a build up of ejaculate, they think it’s pee, so they hold it back, clenching their muscles to hold it in, and of course they’re not only spoiling sex, but they’re failing to experience the excitement of female ejaculation, gushing or squirting orgasms.
Of course this is understandable: women are educated from a very early age as young girls to be clean and nice.
The idea that female ejaculation might involve the release of urine – or indeed the release of any other bodily fluid – might be one of the reasons why so few women seem to be able to experience it in a relaxed joyful way.
Keep in mind this is nothing to do with golden showers or watersports! Of course if you want to continue believing that the fluid which women expel during female ejaculation is urine, go ahead. But if you want to explore the new aspects of your sexuality, please take on board the fact that female ejaculatory fluid is mostly prostatic fluid with a little bit of glucose and tiny amounts of urine from the urethra.
This fluid is very clear, it doesn’t smell or taste like urine, and it won’t stain your sheets (which urine will do).
One of the other myths that goes along with female ejaculation is that the vast majority of women need clitoral stimulation before they can reach orgasm. But this is not true. Women don’t require clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm, they rely on it – because they have not discovered how to reach orgasm through G spot stimulation.
But that isn’t because they’re incapable of doing so: it’s because they don’t know that they can do it, or how to do it.
For many women the ideal form of orgasm is that produced by combined clitoral and G spot stimulation.
And that’s a useful approach because it gets away from the black or white, “clitoral or vaginal” orgasm debate.
Accepting there is still research to be done here to fully understand the phenomenon of female ejaculation, gushing or squirting, women who can ejaculate during orgasm, or even release a little Amrita, are demonstrating something more profound about female sexuality. They reveal its power, its magnificence, and in some sense its equality to the male orgasm – at least as judged by ejaculation.